Tag Archives: child

Apology :(

Before I say my piece I find I must apologize while repeatedly bashing my head to the floor in an attempt to bow as low as possible…I really didn’t mean to abandon you all, it’s just that life interrupted…well I’ll get into that now without making further excuses (though I hope you can forgive my selfishness)…..

So, without further ado, I have something I need to get of my chest…

Without trying to sound vain or self-important, I’ve always felt a little misplaced from reality, I don’t know if it’s because of my history (as short as it is), or whatever, but I’ve tended to view life in a color most people would find…strange… Now, here in America that might be what we call individuality, though personally I don’t believe individuality is something that should ostracize an individual….

But still, I digress…the real situation I am running into is this…yes I’ve always felt misplaced, like I really don’t belong, but I’ve always felt at peace with the fact, I had a place just in knowing that even if the rest of the world found me different, in my head and my heart I would always find my place to belong…

Then, without warning or preparation, I was thrust into bachelorhood, the dreaded time when every child has to face the world on their own. Now, the world is crowding in, my head is overflowing, and my heart is heavy…in this storm of “reality” I am losing that place I found so comforting in my childhood, my sense of self is slowly being eroded by the necessities of the daily grind…

I don’t want to lose the magic of my childhood but I fear that in order survive and “grow” up I must…maybe it’s because I’m an artist at heart, but this concept terrifies me, the idea of succumbing to the routine of a “nine to five” life until I retire *shiver* I have no words with which to describe such terror…

So I’m reaching out for help…I have reached the limits of my knowledge and I ask those on here who have come before…how were you, as adults, able to transition from child to adult and still maintain your sense of self? Is it even possible?

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